Hiatus

This is a self-portrait of my emotional state after coming back from the hospital following an endoscopy — a camera pushed down my throat, my body turned inside out. The doctor told me he had found a hiatus hernia, something that was constantly irritating my oesophagus and causing painful heartburn.

Hearing that diagnosis scared me. It felt physical, but also deeply emotional. I remember sitting with the sensation that my body was breaking from the inside, as if my heart was wounded, bleeding slowly, quietly. The pain wasn’t only in my chest — it was in my head, in my breath, in the way I looked at myself.

This painting holds that moment of fear and vulnerability. The stress and anxiety are written across my face. The tension in the eyes, the clenched mouth, the chaos of colour all come from that period when discomfort became constant and rest felt impossible.

It was a hard time. A moment when health, emotion and fear collapsed into one. Painting this was my way of making that invisible pain visible — of giving a face to something I couldn’t properly explain with words.

"Technique painting: Acrylic, Oil, Chalk, Oil Pastels on Canvas and spray paint on canvas 40" by 32"